Online dating enables individuals to introduce themselves to possible connections through the internet with the aim of developing romantic, sexual, or personal relationships. Since we live in a digitalized society, people tend to move to online activities through the internet. Ryan (2016) postulates that about 89% of people in the United States have access to the internet and computers. Companies, such as eHarmony, Match, and Zoosk, provide online dating services through the use of software applications and websites. Meeting a partner through online dating sites has both drawbacks and benefits. Trust and loyalty are essential in a relationship. Online dating seems like an innovative way to meet a new partner, but there is a downside to online dating. Deception or catfishing is very common among digital dating. I think people should stop pretending to be someone they are not. If a person is looking for a real relationship, it is hard to build trust if you were deluded in the beginning.
Online dating companies try to convince the general public and singles that seeking a partner through online dating platforms is an ideal and effective way of getting hooked up with a partner even though it is not valid. In the United States, online dating is common among young adults and other groups identified as gay or lesbians. Almost half of the individuals between 18 and 29 years of age have used a dating app or site. According to Anderson, Vogels, and Turner (2020), about 20% of the group reveals that they have been in a trustworthy relationship or married a person they met from online dating sites. It shows that a larger percentage of online dating users believe that the platforms are trusted and are full of deceptions. Those who have used online dating platforms give mixed reactions to how their experiences. Many people believe that the media increase dishonesty and pretense among partners since there is a lack of adequate strategies by the companies to verify the information being provided by the users. The problem has significantly contributed to inappropriate marriages.
In a relationship, loyalty and trust are essential elements. The success of a relationship is much determined by the aspects. Loyalty involves faithfulness and devotion to one another. Despite the increasing acceptance of online dating, some uncertainties exist in online relationships. D’Costa (2014) highlights that around 54% of those dating online believe that partners give false details of their profiles. It is evident that deceptions are very common among digital dating. Many people tend to provide incorrect information and portray different personalities. They believe that being dishonest increases their chances of getting a partner as people are attracted to appealing details given by other partners more than the actual facts about the person. The truth is always revealed when the partners meet physically. Some people even use wrong pictures on the sites to attract a partner. The main aim of individuals on online dating platforms is to get a partner; therefore, they do everything they believe can help them attract a partner even it involves deceiving the potential partners through giving wrong information about them.
In many cases, dishonesties are detected by partners leading to a lack of loyalty and trust. Even though some people are capable of containing the deceits, a large number of relationships always end after their catfish tricks are revealed since they are always uncomfortable (Finkel et al., 2012). Trust and loyalty is lost when the truth is informed about the deceptive partners. It is difficult to believe in a person who initially gave wrong information about themselves. It is thought that there are many things that they hide from the partner, and can the partner can no longer have confidence in him or her after realizing their untrusted behavior of pretending to be who he or she is not. In this case, many people find it difficult to trust people from dating sites as their partners due to the different tricks used by the daters to attract partners. Without thinking of the possible consequences of pretense, people continue to give contradictory information on their profile details. People have different experiences in online dating. Some believe that the platforms have various advantages over physical dating, citing some benefits. On the other hand, some people state that the cons of online dating sites outweigh the advantages based on their experience while using the platforms.
Dating sites have various flaws despite being visited by millions of individuals each day. Firstly, since the platforms give individuals wide access to potential partners, making choices can be overwhelming and confusing (Finkel & Sprecher, 2012). With no clear strategy and plan for determining the right partner, daters can have difficulty in finding the perfect partner instead of initiating a satisfactory relationship. Secondly, the matching of partners through online dating is difficult since the tasting process may not be accurate as some people change over time or present differently. The matching process may overlook appropriate partners leading to incorrect relationships. Moreover, there is no sufficient evidence available for matching of the people. Finkel and Sprecher (2012) opine that there are insufficient details among the users to describe the person. People end up getting partners without adequate knowledge about them. Although some sites, such as PerfectMatch.com, have developed matching algorithms that enable individuals to find a compatible mate.
Despite online dating platforms’ success, anecdotal accounts and press claim that online dating is full of deceptions. About 85% of the participants feel that other people misinterpreted their profile detail or physical appearance (Hancock, Toma & Ellison, 2007). Editing and packaging of self to impress others is a hindrance to social interactions. Deceptions do not only mean exaggerations or lying but also giving attractive self-presentation by not giving sufficient information about a purpose. Online communication provided by online dating sites gives the users opportunities to involve in a selective self-representative. The frequency of deception in profiles of users of online dating sites has continued to increase in the past years. Some of the aspects that people are not honest in giving information include appearance, age, height, experiences, professions, and marital status. People believe that providing the right information reduces their level of attraction to others, making them lose potential partners.
People have different reasons for misrepresenting themselves in online dating profiles. Firstly, deceptions are meant to give a positive impression to potential partners (Sharabi, 2018). They believe that providing wrong information would attract people towards them, making them get a partner faster. Online dating sites are a platform that increases incorrect hookups due to deception and catfishing tricks. For instance, some people express themselves as wealthy individuals to attract others due to their wealth, which does not exist in real life. Since many people want to get married to wealthy individuals, pretending to be a well-off person gives them higher chances of getting a partner. Secondly, some people give false information on online dating sites to make other people believe that they are better than them. Some individuals use the sites to show off to others and make other people believe that they are superior.
I think that people should stop deceptions and making pretending to be who they are not. Online dating is a significant factor that fuels the pretense among the daters. Since every person has the freedom to give any information about themselves, people take advantage of the opportunity to provide false details. There are various consequences associated with pretense in online dating platforms. To begin with, it leads to an inappropriate match. Giving information that is not true about individuals makes them meet imperfect mate (Finkel & Sprecher, 2012). The partner is attracted to a person based on the information given on the profile and not the actual person. This situation contributes to the increased rate of divorce in the state as disappointments began after realizing the real characters of a person. Loyalty and trust among the couples develop, leading to separations. Secondly, pretending to be who you are not makes some people miss an opportunity to be united with a partner. For instance, someone looking for a person with their real personalities is barred by the false information provided by the person. Moreover, illegal criminal activities are also accelerated by pretense on online dating platforms. Some criminals take advantage of the sites to hook up to their target individuals, allowing them to engage in illegal activities to the person. If someone is looking for a serious relationship, it isn’t easy to build trust if you were deluded in the beginning. Experiences make people fear being tricked for the second time. Online dating platforms makes some people fear getting into a relationship due to dishonesty they experienced from online daters. Some people are adversely affected in their entire life from deceptions and catfishing tricks they experienced while using online dating platforms. It is important to appreciate how we are despite the circumstances. Online dating sites tend to pull us against our original being and, therefore, should be avoided.
As much as people find online dating appropriate to them, there are various factors that should be put into consideration before selecting a partner. There is a high rate of pretense experienced by the users, making them be attracted to the wrong individuals. People should be keen on selecting a partner. They need to develop proper strategies to confirm the information provided by the potential partner before making a decision. For instance, they should ask for physical meetings before beginning the relationship to ratify the profile details of a person. Besides, users of online dating sites should not rush at getting into a relationship. They need to take a more extended period to study the potential partners to ensure that they are the right mates. In addition, online dating sites should develop a mechanism and policy that regulates the type of information given by the users. The companies need to verify the details before displaying them to the public. The strategy would help to avoid deceptions and catfishing tricks of the daters to attract partners. People should avoid online dating as much as possible as they give opportunities for scams. Physical meetings and dating are the most reliable for people who are looking for partners.